Just Rambling

Here is the place where I ramble on and on and dont care what people think about my rambling. It's my blog and I can say what I want to. I am not forcing any one to read it. Its all about the way I feel. If you dont want to know or you think it may hurt your feelings then dont read it. It wont hurt my feelings any if no one reads it. Its just a way of expressing what I am thinking and feeling at the time I am journaling my thoughts here.

I know what kind of person I am. I am a strong person, who for the most part dont let people run over me. I tell them what I think about any given situation and if they dont like the way I feel about things then its their problem and they have to find a way to handle it on their own.

Today is a dark and gloomy day. Kinda like I feel. Didnt sleep good last night. Was hot then cold then hot. Woke up every little bit. Finally got up at 4am and went on face book for a while. Went back to bed and slept until 8:30. Got up and now I am here. Still sleepy. The tv is on for background noise. Not sure what all I am going to do today but will probably nap at some point.

Feeling down because of the holidays. Missing the boys. Just lots of little things adding up to make me feel blah the last few days. Its so dark in the house today that you need the lights on to see. I dont like it since we had to set the clocks back an hour. Its full dark about 5:30 pm now and makes it feel like it should be bed time. I for the most part go to bed around 12-1 or so. Have been waking up every hour on the hour.

Do I ever feel sorry for myself? Sure do. But I dont let it drag me down. Dont let it bother me to the point where I feel worthless and that I cant do any thing for myself. I know I can do things if I want to do them. I go where I want to when I want to. I know I have family and friends who love me for me. I know that not every one loves me and that dont bother me. I dont love every one either. I dont hate them either. I just dont like their actions. I was taught that hating some one is wrong. I was taught lots of things that I still believe in today and taught my daughter. Some of the things I was taught, I have not believed in for a long time. Will I change my mind about the way I think about them? I might and I might not but thats my choice to make. If I could go back and change my past, would I? I dont think so. Why? Because it is the past that shaped the parts of me that makes me the person I am today. For the most part I am happy with the way my life turned out.

Until next time I hope all is well in your own little piece of the world. Take care and enjoy your me time.